I have gained an even larger appreciation for music. I am learning about why composers do certain things, and why I like certain composers more than others. I have learned to love Dandelot (solfege exercises) and hate Starer (rhythm exercises). I have gained a better repertoire of pieces. I can officially say that I can sing German and say I like it. (It was so hard for me at first.) I have become a Figured Bass Queen. (I like to think so anyway. I'm super fast at it.) My piano skills have increased, though my fingering still stinks. I've gained a better appreciation for my directors by being in their shoes for a day. I got to sing tons of solos in choir this year including Handel's Messiah: Rejoice Greatly, Schubert's Mass in G: Benedictus, and When the Foeman Bares His Steel as Mabel. I have had a great year studying music. I've worked my butt off. I've done my very best, not looking back.
So, I must know: WHY ON EARTH WOULD I NOT MAKE THE UNIVERSITY OF UTAH'S VOCAL PERFORMANCE PROGRAM? I'm a huge asset to any program! I know it because I know my level of dedication. I know I would do anything to keep up this learning and improving of my talent. I am good! I know it. I have been trying to figure this out for a couple of weeks now. I can't help but to think, maybe I have something in store? But what? I know this what makes me happiest. I leave school ready to come back, wanting to come back, each day. I know this my calling in life, under only motherhood. I feel so comfortable singing. I feel alive. My world disappears for those minutes I'm performing. I'm someone else for just a few minutes, and it makes me love me even more.
So, until I figure out what I am to do, here I am...CONFUSED.
3 comments:
Oh boy. If you didn't make the program, then I am in trouble when I try out.
I honestly do not know what they were thinking. I could listen to your soaring soprano voice ALL DAY LONG. (That is a huge compliment. I don't like many sopranos.)
You're amazing. There must be something stupendous coming for you.
You deserve the best.
So, that totally stinks and I know what that is like. Oakcrest for example. I applied and interviewed and I will admit, think I would have been a great camp leader, and I was super excited, then I didn't get it. For the first time I didn't get a job I had applied for. I was not happy. I cried and was confused because I really had my heart set on it.
To tell you the truth, I am still not sure why I didn't get the job. Nothing monumental different happened in my life during that time that I would have been up at Oakcrest. I won't ever know in this life, but I now know that enough things have happened in my life to be grateful someone else is in charge. Thank goodness He knows better for me than I do. Someone pointed out that maybe it really didn't matter if I got the job or not, but there was someone out there who really needed it and because of that, the position went to them. That was a new thought.
Any way sorry to ramble on. I know you know the whole "there is something else, the Lord is in charge" thing. You know who you are and what you want, unfortunatley it might not be in line the way you want it to right now, which, ya stinks. That what faith if for and all about. I know you know that too.
You will figure it out. Just try and focusing on what needs to be done in your life right now and everything else will fall into place:)
It's dang hard getting in to the music programs around here - Mandy fought tooth and nail and then when she did make it in, it was dog eat dog to survive. But 4 years later now with her degree and a masters program ahead of her it's certainly worth the effort to keep trying. You are very talented! Keep trying!! Thought of going blue? Mandy had the red option and opted out. Her adventures at the Y have been beyond anything she could have had at the U. Just a thought... hang in there!
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