Disclaimer: This is a really long venting post. Don't mind me...
A post or two ago I said, "I am having a hard time finding balance, but with some time, I think I may get the hang of things."
I just wanted to say that I either lied or just was being really optimistic. I have never felt so overwhelmed. I really loaded my plate this meal, and after three bites I was already stuffed. I keep taking more than I can chew, though.
I am the type of person who is described in these Ingrid Michaelson lyrics:
"I could write my name by the age of three
and I don't need anyone to cut my meat for me.
I'm a big girl now, see my big girl shoes.
It'll take more than just a breeze to make me
Fall over, fall over, fall overboard, overboard.
Fall overboard just so you can catch me.
But as strong as I seem to think I am my distressing damsel,
She comes out at night when the moon's filled up and your eyes are
bright, then I think I simply aught to
Fall over, fall over, fall overboard, overboard.
Fall overboard just so you can catch me.
You can catch me. "
I really try to do everything myself. I forget, after getting into the rut of day to day life, that sometimes I NEED to ask for help.
I recently was browsing the Internet and came across Dr. Deb's explanation of "The Myths of Asking for Help." She lists a myth and tells us the truth behind it all. It really applies to me, so maybe it could help one of you.
Dr. Deb says, "Some of us find it easy to ask for help from others. But for many, asking for help is NOT an easy thing to do. Do these myths keep you stuck?
Myth: It makes us look vulnerable.
Truth: Asking for help creates an atmosphere of empowerment. It communicates to others that, while you may not have the answers, you are willing to find them and make things better.
Myth: Holding things in and keeping personal issues under wraps keeps us secure.
Truth: In reality, not allowing yourself to be "known" keeps you socially isolated, and therefore, insecure. When you seek the counsel of others, you'll not only connect with them, but you'll also realize that you're not alone in your struggle.
Myth: It bother others.
Truth: Doing it all can do you in. Being too self-sufficient can create stress levels that tip your physical, emotional and spiritual scales.
Myth: Highly successful people never ask for help.
Truth: Actually, successful individuals will tell you that the key to success is knowing your strengths and weaknesses. Learning how to delegate, asking for help and letting others show you the way are part of the plan. Successful people are driven and motivated -- and when the going gets tough, the tough ask for help!
Myth: I am a giver. I don't like when others help me.
Truth: Get over it. With practice, you'll learn to be comfortable when others help you. And before long, you'll come to realize that you deserve a helping hand every now and then.
Remember: Have realistic expectations for the kind of help you are seeking. Express your needs simply and clearly. Let others know you are there to help them as well. Praise your pals for their assistance and pat yourself for asking for help."
All of this said, I still don't know what I need help with. I just need to purge my life of all this extra, for lack of a better word, JUNK. It's weighing me down, and I am really starting to struggle with school, work/leadership, and friends.
Here's my thinking: being in a rut entails being in a boring situation: a routine procedure, situation, or way of life that has become uninteresting and tiresome (literally, I'm EXHAUSTED). So, I need to rest, first of all, and then I need to put something into my life that mixes up the routine. If I can't quit school, work, or any source of income, which I can't, then I will add something in that makes me happy, relieves me of stress, and something that makes me feel good about myself. As I've been thinking about this, I've narrowed it down to two things I need to do.
The first is to start a hobby that is going to make me exercise, without being direct exercise. I have chosen rock climbing. Four years ago I took a half semester rock climbing class at Snow College, and I fell in love with the sport. It really gives you a feeling of accomplishment when you reach the top of something. I love the outdoors as it is, so this is a great excuse to go. It's getting a bit too cold to do outdoor climbing, so I'll be getting a membership to a rock wall gym. I plan on getting my own gear and really taking off with this. I realized I really don't have a hobby-a legitimate hobby of my own. Music has become part of my life, part of the routine, so it no longer is a hobby. If you count it as a hobby, I do like to clean, but even then it is something you have to do (aka part of the routine). Alas, my hobby will be rock climbing, and I will get in shape while I enjoy myself with some good fun.
The second way I think is one I always put off to be the last of my worries: myself. I noticed a trend in my existence. The last five years I have gotten sicker than I have my entire life. Also, in the last five years, I have had more serious stresses than I ever have in my entire life. I need to take time out of each day to reflect, meditate, and relax for myself. It's so easy to get caught up in my day. It's always the go, go, GO type. I need to pray more. I need to count my blessings. I need to direct my thoughts to the good in my life at the beginning and the end of each day. I don't have a focus any more, and that's why I'm getting so frustrated all the time. I need to take 30 minutes every single day and make goals, become tranquil, and most importantly express my gratitude to my Heavenly Father. Christ needs to become my center focus again. I need to relate and reflect on how I'm doing to become more like Him.
A post or two ago I said, "I am having a hard time finding balance, but with some time, I think I may get the hang of things."
I just wanted to say that I either lied or just was being really optimistic. I have never felt so overwhelmed. I really loaded my plate this meal, and after three bites I was already stuffed. I keep taking more than I can chew, though.
I am the type of person who is described in these Ingrid Michaelson lyrics:
"I could write my name by the age of three
and I don't need anyone to cut my meat for me.
I'm a big girl now, see my big girl shoes.
It'll take more than just a breeze to make me
Fall over, fall over, fall overboard, overboard.
Fall overboard just so you can catch me.
But as strong as I seem to think I am my distressing damsel,
She comes out at night when the moon's filled up and your eyes are
bright, then I think I simply aught to
Fall over, fall over, fall overboard, overboard.
Fall overboard just so you can catch me.
You can catch me. "
I really try to do everything myself. I forget, after getting into the rut of day to day life, that sometimes I NEED to ask for help.
I recently was browsing the Internet and came across Dr. Deb's explanation of "The Myths of Asking for Help." She lists a myth and tells us the truth behind it all. It really applies to me, so maybe it could help one of you.
Dr. Deb says, "Some of us find it easy to ask for help from others. But for many, asking for help is NOT an easy thing to do. Do these myths keep you stuck?
Myth: It makes us look vulnerable.
Truth: Asking for help creates an atmosphere of empowerment. It communicates to others that, while you may not have the answers, you are willing to find them and make things better.
Myth: Holding things in and keeping personal issues under wraps keeps us secure.
Truth: In reality, not allowing yourself to be "known" keeps you socially isolated, and therefore, insecure. When you seek the counsel of others, you'll not only connect with them, but you'll also realize that you're not alone in your struggle.
Myth: It bother others.
Truth: Doing it all can do you in. Being too self-sufficient can create stress levels that tip your physical, emotional and spiritual scales.
Myth: Highly successful people never ask for help.
Truth: Actually, successful individuals will tell you that the key to success is knowing your strengths and weaknesses. Learning how to delegate, asking for help and letting others show you the way are part of the plan. Successful people are driven and motivated -- and when the going gets tough, the tough ask for help!
Myth: I am a giver. I don't like when others help me.
Truth: Get over it. With practice, you'll learn to be comfortable when others help you. And before long, you'll come to realize that you deserve a helping hand every now and then.
Remember: Have realistic expectations for the kind of help you are seeking. Express your needs simply and clearly. Let others know you are there to help them as well. Praise your pals for their assistance and pat yourself for asking for help."
All of this said, I still don't know what I need help with. I just need to purge my life of all this extra, for lack of a better word, JUNK. It's weighing me down, and I am really starting to struggle with school, work/leadership, and friends.
Here's my thinking: being in a rut entails being in a boring situation: a routine procedure, situation, or way of life that has become uninteresting and tiresome (literally, I'm EXHAUSTED). So, I need to rest, first of all, and then I need to put something into my life that mixes up the routine. If I can't quit school, work, or any source of income, which I can't, then I will add something in that makes me happy, relieves me of stress, and something that makes me feel good about myself. As I've been thinking about this, I've narrowed it down to two things I need to do.
The first is to start a hobby that is going to make me exercise, without being direct exercise. I have chosen rock climbing. Four years ago I took a half semester rock climbing class at Snow College, and I fell in love with the sport. It really gives you a feeling of accomplishment when you reach the top of something. I love the outdoors as it is, so this is a great excuse to go. It's getting a bit too cold to do outdoor climbing, so I'll be getting a membership to a rock wall gym. I plan on getting my own gear and really taking off with this. I realized I really don't have a hobby-a legitimate hobby of my own. Music has become part of my life, part of the routine, so it no longer is a hobby. If you count it as a hobby, I do like to clean, but even then it is something you have to do (aka part of the routine). Alas, my hobby will be rock climbing, and I will get in shape while I enjoy myself with some good fun.
The second way I think is one I always put off to be the last of my worries: myself. I noticed a trend in my existence. The last five years I have gotten sicker than I have my entire life. Also, in the last five years, I have had more serious stresses than I ever have in my entire life. I need to take time out of each day to reflect, meditate, and relax for myself. It's so easy to get caught up in my day. It's always the go, go, GO type. I need to pray more. I need to count my blessings. I need to direct my thoughts to the good in my life at the beginning and the end of each day. I don't have a focus any more, and that's why I'm getting so frustrated all the time. I need to take 30 minutes every single day and make goals, become tranquil, and most importantly express my gratitude to my Heavenly Father. Christ needs to become my center focus again. I need to relate and reflect on how I'm doing to become more like Him.
Writing really does help. Putting my thoughts into words really cements it in place, and it will help me to take part in my "plan of attack." Let's just hope it's a plan that will work.
4 comments:
Girl-YOU ROCK!!! I think you put into words to eloquently what so many of us feel and think. I am one of those GO GO GO people that if I sit it is monotonous, and boring. Then I realized my life was over scheduled and chaotic. I had to sit down, like you make goals, and see what was priority. Sometimes it feels selfish to make myself #1 priority once in a while. But when I do it, I feel SO much better and refreshed!! Take the time and don something FOR you. Not to better your life, like school and work, just to better you. Read, go to a chick flick, buy a really big ice cream and just it in the car with the radio loud and let your mind wander free. You are AWESOME!!
rock climbing is the best! to me it is such a great stress reliever too, and like you said it does give you a feeling of accomplishment!
Thank you for daying all that and finding that information to share. That was something I needed to hear and something I struggle with as well. I agree with what you said, "Writing really does help. Putting my thoughts into words really cements it in place . . " I do the same thing! Other reasons why I write is because its easier to forget when its written down so you can come back for it later; and I'm HORRIBLE with words! I stumble over what I day all the time and writing it sown so I can see it helps me organize my thoughts. Thanks again!
I want rock climbing to become my hobby as well. I LOVE it! PS I may be ready this post late, but I did love it! Thanks Treb!
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